Thursday, April 4, 2013

MOMBLOGGER: To whom am I blogging for?- A letter to my Insecure Reader.

Only few of the people relatively around me understand what -Mom blogger- is.
I've been judged many times as to why I keep my family life too public.
And as to  why I let my style of parenting and mothering be open to anyone when I am not a real expert on this matter. This strikes me BIG TIME.

Excuse me! I am not being  compensated for this. Never did I claim that I am an expert. I know a lot of you would ask of what am I getting in exchange as I write about my children? What am I getting in return as I share tidbits of our lives?

I've been MIA for a couple of weeks - giving time to analyze if I am on the right path. Am I really enjoying what I do, what I write and what I share? Now that my words are out there for everyone to read. Am I really a mom blogger or just a mom blogger wanna-be?


Blogging about parenting and mothering is not all about happy moments, good vibes or not about showcasing the good side of me. Not even about bragging my kids to public, to friends.  It is mainly about how I handle this stage of my life in the most natural way. Indeed difficult.  Difficult financially, physically and emotionally.

I do yell. I get mad. I spank my kids. I cry over their tantrums. I get tired, lazy and sleepy.  No matter how I keep myself awake and alive, there are times that I miss to give them their vitamins or their prescribed medicine.

I was judged many times- for allowing them to use tech gadgets at an early age, even had a debate  for not breastfeeding them, was questioned when I send Clian to an exclusive and expensive school in our place.

Honestly, there came a time that I asked myself of what I have gotten into. God has been good for sending four little angels with out wings my way but motherhood had  made me realized that I have No house, No savings, No career. And hmm.. No sexy body.  CHOZ!

I am not perfect. Never did I say I AM!!  Parenting and Mothering does not mean you have to be perfect.  When you become a mom, the last thing you want to feel is to be judged because everybody is trying to do the best they can. No matter what you do, no matter what your parenting style is, you will always be the best mom to your kids.

And to you, dear Insecure Reader,

Though I am blogging because I want to share what I have learned along each stages of motherhood, I'll tell you frankly that I am not blogging because of YOU. Not even for dollar or fame as claimed it to.
So please don't judge me as you don't know what I've been through!

Here's why I blog:

I am blogging for  my kids.  This is what they will have someday when they wish to recall their childhood- when they wish to see how silly,funny, clever, hardheaded, childish  and loving they are. Memories of their childhood that I can keep through my writings. Along with their thousands of pictures on my pc.

I am blogging for my husband.  Someday, when I am old and gray my hubby will be the only grown up who would be interested in checking this blogsite with me. Recalling what we've been through. Reminiscing how we've handled these four little brats.

I am blogging for myself. Everybody knows how difficult motherhood is but I don’t have anyone to talk to about it. I don't like anyone near me to think that I regret it.  It is only through writing that I can express my self clearly without being judged.
                                      . My memory does not serve me better after giving birth consecutively and if it was not  through blogging ,  I may have forgotten how my kids have grown up so fast.
                                      .There's no place like finding comfort , connections and creating a space for myself along with other homeMIES around the world.

I am blogging for my family. Someday, maybe when I am gone, my kids can turn into this to see how my husband and I managed to raise, love and care them perfectly without hesitations and regrets. That despite the difficulty of living, we managed to provide them the best of what we can.


How about you? What are you blogging for? To whom are you blogging for?



I hope you enjoyed your stay. Please consider following me on twitter and G+ or liking me on facebook.

29 comments:

  1. IGNORE those insecure readers! They are are just jealous! Keep on writing :)

    Mabuhay ang mga Pinay! lol

    Anne

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    1. MABUHAY!! Thanks Anne!! I did, that's why I am back!! I miss writing!!

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  2. You made the right decision to keep blogging! Its our lives,not theirs anyway:)

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    1. Thanks Sanna! Yeah, their words will not make me less!..

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  3. never mind them na.. you're right they're not the reason naman why you blog eh.. just keep on blogging.. go mommy Joan! ang pretty mo ;)

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    1. Hi Arline! Thanks for reading the post and thanks for the compliment. :) ..I am actually one of your avid readers though di ako masyado nakakapagcomment, nakikibasa lang.. I enjoyed reading your Coron adventure and your meetup with MOMMY JOY kasama ni Joanne.. See you then!! :)

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  4. What a wonderful piece. There are many reasons we blog as moms. And being judged isn't one of them.

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    1. Hi Jennifer!.. Old saying may still be true that "you can't please all the people around you". But that's okay, for as long as I know that I am doing the right thing for myself and for my kids, there's nothing that I should worry about. This is my diary, it's mine and is someone is being bothered with what I write, she better not read my posts. I am not forcing anyone to stay here.

      Thanks for dropping by dear! :) See you around!

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  5. I wrote a post some what similar to this a couple of days ago, I started my blog for me, but since I have started gainined readers I feel more and more judged and much like I should censor myself or limit the things I write. I (like you) decided that I will continue to write for me, and not those who are insecure or judgemental. I wish you all the best with your blog and look forward to reading more
    www.mommysrambles.blogspot.com

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    1. Oh really! I better check on that too! I hope you enjoyed your stay and please expect me on your blogsite too..


      See you!

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  6. Beautifully said. I learned in my life that no matter what we do or say, good or bad, someone won't like it or critizised us. So as long that I am happy with what I am doing and what I do is right in the eyes of God, I try to not to care.
    My reason for blogging is to have a legacy to my grandchildren one day and to express myself, to get to know so many wonderful people, to learn and to be what God intended me to be:)
    Thanks for visiting my humble site.
    Good luck to more years of blogging.

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    1. Thanks for taking time to comment mommy joy and belated happy birthday!! It's really different when the compliment came from you.. it's like AWE-inspiring! Thanks and I hope to see you more often!!!

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  7. Newest follower here! I found you through the blog hop. You have a super cute blog, I can't wait to read more. You can find me at meandmr.com

    -Melanie @meandmr.com

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    1. Thank You dear! I hope you enjoyed your stay and will be looking forward to see you again! Expect a visit from me.

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  8. I did enjoy my stay! :-) I am your newest follower.

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    1. Thanks dear!! You are always welcome here! I hope my posts are useful to you.

      See you around!

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  9. I am fortunate that I haven't encountered trolls in my blog yet. I think the only advice I could give you is to practice the art of deadma. Ignore them sis and don't let them bring you down.

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    1. Good for you dear! I hope you won't get any of those nega comments. It hurts a lot at first but once you overcome the pain, you'll realize that the negative comment has taught you to become new and refreshed.

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  10. Very well said. I also received negative comments and somehow it affected me but I realized, I blog because I wanted to document our experiences so dedma na lang si negative reader. Just keep on blogging! =)

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    1. Thanks dear! It will you an oppps moment. But that will make you stronger!

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  11. Don't let them bring you down. Blog your worries away :) I also feel sad that some people close to me do not understand why I blog and share my life online...let's just continue to write anyway :)

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  12. Hi, Joan.

    We already perfected the art of multi-tasking, and now here in the blogosphere we have to improve naman our skills in dedmatology. Hehehe! Dedmatology lang katapat niyan, titigil din yan.

    Cheer up, fab mama!!! :*

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  13. Nako, don't mind 'haters'. Inggit lang yan sayo 'coz you can clearly express yourself in writing. :D I blog for the same reasons and because it's really just fun to write about our silly experiences with our kids!

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  14. Agree dear! Dedma lang. They don't own our lives. Yes we write stuffs publicly, but it's their choice to read or not to. If the reader hates us, why bother reading diba? Wrinkles lang yan dear, pretty mo pa naman. Cheer up! =)

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  15. Finally linking up with my Friday Flash Blog community. Thanks for linking up and sharing in the fun! Have a terrific week and see you on Thursday.

    Jennifer
    www.TheJennyEvolution.com

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  16. Never mind those troll readers! You started your blog for yourself not for them. I am lucky I don't have them yet. Sana wag naman. Pero deadmatology is learned and practiced. I think that's what you need to practice right now. Goodluck!

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  17. Like what I have read from Fab After Forty that Bianca GOnzalez said, "bashers keep the balance". Let trolls be trolls. After all, sila naman nasstress eh. Mga baliw sila. :D

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  18. I found you on the "Funny Baby Video's" blog hop! What is the big deal if someone is a "mommy blogger?" I'm a mommy blogger. I love reading about other peoples lives and how they overcome obstacles with their lives and children. I chalk it up as free advice!!
    Keep blogging for all of your reasons above!!
    Glad I found your page.

    -Ellen

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  19. This is a great post Joan. Just found it from your comment on voiceBoks at http://voiceboks.com/are-mommy-bloggers-being-stereotyped-unfairly/. It can get to be really discouraging, especially when people around us discourage us, but it seems wherever we go and whatever we do in this world, there will always be someone negatively hurting us some way or another.

    Your post is so encouraging, especially for those who might find it difficult at times to keep blogging.

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